I’m a heartbreaker…..or am I???

I’ve heard lots of talk in regards to men and breakups. Things like “When a guy’s relationship ends, he replaces her. When a woman’s relationship ends, she mourns and cries for months,” or “Guys just don’t care” and lots of other nonsense.

Take a look at some of the universal truths about guys and breakups, most of which will surprise you.
Breakups are HARD on all guys.  Simple enough to say, but the fact is: If a guy is terrible after a breakup, it is just prove to how rough the breakup was on him. Some people cope by lashing out.
But what about the guy who breaks up and goes totally cold?

Jerry Seinfeld once said that breaking up a relationship needs to be like taking off a Band-aid – One motion: OFF! In the same regard, when a relationship ends, it is much much harder for a guy to go back and discuss and revisit and talk through and explain.

Guys like focused on a tight range of emotions, somewhere between amusement and happiness. So any interaction that a guy knows will bring him out of that sweet range of emotions is an interaction he’s going to do everything he can to avoid.
When a guy breaks up with his lady and immediately gets into a new relationship right afterwards is a no-brainer; a guy does this because he doesn’t want to be alone and he doesn’t want to “deal with himself.” Guys need to work their internal issues out, which brings me to another question…
But what about the guy that “goes off and starts hooking up with every girl?
Every guy has a set of core values for who he is, what he stands for, and what he really wants out of life. Sometimes in a relationship, a guy will really, really love a girl and may start to compromise these core values. Maybe he changes his lifestyle, stops hanging out with certain friends, or changes his habits.
It seems innocent enough, but over time the guy begins to starve for whatever it was he got from the things he gave up. It changes the guy and, in turn, changes the relationship. As a result,  the relationship usually suffers and, in the case of this example, ends.
When the relationship ends, that guy is forced to evaluate himself – he doesn’t like who he’s become and he doesn’t like the fact that his relationship and his love brought him to this place.
So what’s the solution? Hook up with a bunch of girls and have a series of flings.

Sooner or later, a guy will come to a place of reconciliation with himself, it’s essential that he does before he starts another relationship.
Long story short, if a guy acts extreme after a breakup, it’s his way of dealing with his emotions about his relationship and relationships in general.

Posted with WordPress for BlackBerry.

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